Think Positive For A Positive Life

I am a person who has often felt unhappy with the hand of cards that I have been dealt; especially when going through the teenage years. Many people commented at how down and depressed I often would be.

You may be wondering what my troubles were. I developed a speech impediment when I was just a young boy. Stuttering put a huge dent in my confidence and made me withdraw into my shell and the lack of beneficial stuttering therapy didn’t exactly help.

I had a weight problem which was mainly caused by comfort eating when I was depressed. Since birth, I have had a bald patch on my head, it is not a large area of baldness, however it was big enough for people to notice and mock me. I was always the shortest person in the class and for a male I am well below the average height at five-foot four. I have struggled in my career working selling air compressors and abac compressors however I am now doing rather better. 

At the age of eighteen, I was having a conversation with one of friends who is called John. John was one of the people I had always been jealous of for many different reasons. On this particular evening we were both fairly drunk and John had became quite emotional. He opened up to me in a way that I had never seen before and stated that he thought his father was an alcoholic and that he has regularly hit his mother in the past. He was very worried about this and was not sure what to do.

I have learnt that we all have problems and that in most cases there is always people worse off than ourselves. I now try to think in a much more positive way and am very happy with the cards I have been dealt.

Is Low Self Esteem Caused by Other People?

Why Other People are a Cause of Low Self Esteem

You will never see a newborn baby with a self-esteem problem. We have no concept, yet, of other people’s expectations. Then we grow up, start observing, and interacting with, the world and the people in it, and our personal belief systems begin to develop. In a very real sense, our self-esteem becomes based on our interactions with those people. Since we cannot avoid interacting with people, we have to learn how to identify these causes and stop them from affecting us.

The People You Know

Parents lay the foundation for our self image. A child’s self-worth is based, in part, on the expectations of the parents and how well the child can meet those expectations. It is important for parents to realise the limits to which they can push their offspring to excellence. Also, criticism and snide comments can be internalized and become part of the child’s belief system and this will be held throughout their adult life. We cannot change our past, and we cannot blame our parents for wanting us to succeed, but what we can change is the way we look at it. Acknowledge the love, learn to set aside the disappointment, forgive where necessary, and move on. The entire field of positive motivation and daily affirmations is designed to combat those internalized feelings and beliefs and allow us to grow past them.

Your partner has certain expectations regarding your relationship, so it is important that these expectations are verbalized. Falling short of an ideal that you do not even know about can be very damaging to a relationship as well as our own self image. A similar idea can be applied to our relationships with friends and relatives. We need to be sure that we can clarify our role and understand what they expect of us.

Our self-image can also be affected by our relationships at work. On the one hand, your job description makes the expectations of the people in the workplace clear. On the other hand, this clarity also makes in easier to point out our shortcomings and all all know people who are willing to do that pointing. What is important in this situation is to realize that a job can be looked at as  an opportunity for growth. If you do no have the required skills to grow at your job, yet, identify them so you can acquire them and meet your goals.

Comments, Real or Otherwise, From Strangers 

Most of us are affected, to a certain degree, by the remarks of total strangers. Perhaps we overhear comments of people as we walk down the street. We may think they’re about us, though they usually aren’t. Or perhaps we may read comments written in blogs or articles (especially when we actively participate in those blogged discussions. ) Perhaps we identify with certain groups that are discussed/dissed in the media, such as on TV or in magazine articles.

Judgments from people who do not know us can sometimes be more crushing than from those close to us. We might feel that it’s unfair for them to comment since they don’t even know us. What’s even worse is that we might find ourselves agreeing with the negative comments.  What is important here is to identify these feelings and examine their causes. If the observations are actually correct perhaps we can change our mistake (did I forget to shower today? oops!) and also look for positive affirmations to counter the negative feelings. People who know us can sometimes help to set these things into perspective. Many resources, both online and in print, can prove these judgments wrong or help us change them and our view of them..

As you can see, our perception of failing other people’s expectations is the seed from which poor self image sprouts. These causes of low self esteem are ubiquitous and unavoidable so you must learn to guard against them if you want to grow. Learning to deal with yourself and other people in a positive way is the one sure path to confidence and a good self image.

Best Words Of Encouragement For Cancer Patients

If you are a cancer patient I know that two collections of emotions have become your best friend and they refuse to leave your part. I’m right here to let you know that fear as well as despair are not your friends and they must not take part in your life. The following words of support with regard to cancer individuals will give you more than enough outcomes inorder to be pleasant as well as optimistic. Read on and also find out more.

I’ve been known as an inspirational speaker, a title that i refute completely. I think about me personally to be more of an empowerment speaker than enthusiasm.

Motivation includes dealing with feeling good mainly; empowerment encompasses feeling good and offers feasible benefit within the life of a person. Therefore these words of encouragement for cancer malignancy sufferers are considered unsuitable to motivate you merely they are meant to inspire you.

How can empowerment begin? I believe it begins with knowledge. Much of the actual concerns and worries which you have at this moment are the reason that you fully understand so little about what’s going on with you and the options that you have.

Therefore my own first words of enticement for cancer sufferers are to get understanding.  You may go through the material which is from cancerpatientadvocate.com.

There are so many treatment options which may be used to cancer patients with respect to the nature, level of multiply and placement of the sickness. These are generally all things which you must discover.

A larger proportion, in close proximity to 70percent of early detected instances can be effectively treated effectively. You’ll find that there is more anticipation as well as reassurance that are in reality and also information than simply feel good words.

Also for those uncommon and also extreme circumstances about this sickness. Medical technology has sophisticated so much so about make the life span of most individuals bearable and also lively. Do away with your fears by understanding the fact as well as developing a positive attitude. You can also get additional phrases of confidence for cancer sufferers via copingwithhope.com.

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Great Words Of Encouragement

Are you sure what to do if you are to find anything you want online free? If so take just a couple of minutes and go through the following page and you are sure to find great words of encouragement that will help you cope with any difficulties.

Find great words of encouragement on the below article that have powerful, inspirational and motivational words that will uplift your heart and result in you doing well in life.

Perhaps you have been up through terrible tragedies and episodes in life but this day I want to assure you reading these words will have unique impact on you. You should always be ready to share your wants & desires.

If you are depressed then find someone to share the problem with. You will discuss a lot of things and so you might find that you are not the only one going through such

You may also read books, magazines, watch television programs and in that way you will locate encouraging words and advice. Purchase a motivational and encouraging card because they do support in all circumstances that you may face.

Also spending times with friend and watching movies will also help relieve the stress at times.

You can also find some great words of encouragement if you can associate with friends long enough. Keep yourself busy by visiting some entertaining places like game reserves, waterfalls, go shopping, and go to church.

If you don’t meet different people you are at risk of some sicknesses like stroke, high blood pressure, and also suicide just for something that will pass.

For more encouragement words you can rely on other sites that do have great words of encouragement, like secretsofmotivation.com and entwagon.com.

 
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Gift Items You Must Never Ever Give To Your Significant Other – You Shouldn’t Embarrass Yourself

Both males and females are really different in many aspects: the way of thinking, their demands, expectations.

For example, gifts mean a whole lot to women, but we can’t say the same thing about men. A woman knows precisely how to ”read” the message that a gift is giving, but men do not pay too much attention to a gift.

So, choosing the right gift for a woman may be rather difficult. The right gift tells her you are thoughtful, observant and you genuinely understand her. A bad one can tell her exactly the opposite.

Any gift which says you love her, you cherish her, and understand her is fairly safe. What happens if your gift doesn’t express your real feelings for her?

A gift is worth a lot more than a thousand words for a woman. Not many of us men really know what a bad gift for a woman is. In order to not surprise her with a bad gift, here are a few you need to stay away from:

Insult gifts:

-Awful flowers – for women, flowers have a big significance and that’s why you have to realize the distinction between good flowers and bad ones.

If you do not know anything about flowers, you may ask a female florist to help you select the right bouquet for your girlfriend. You don’t want to go there with a few flowers you may give to her grandmother.

-Cheap perfume – it doesn’t matter how fancy it looks, you can’t fool her. Ladies normally know many things about the beauty products, fragrances, and which the best are.

-Lingerie – is really a risky bet. Lingerie made of flannel will probably be definitely not on her taste. You’ve got to select the correct size along with the right style for her.

You’ve got to pick something that she likes and not what you want her to wear. If you didn’t select the correct size, the message she will recognize is that she is too fat, or that you’re insinuating she needs a breast enlargements.  Forget it.

Totally NO gifts:

-A pet – not everyone is glad to get a pet as gift, simply because raising a pet requires a whole lot of responsibility and a lot of work. If she said that she likes dogs, that doesn’t necessarily mean that she wants one. If she decides to get a pet, let her pick one and purchase it herself.

-A present for yourself – like a golf set or a playstation. It’ll be a selfish act. A gift really should be focused on what she wants and not what you want. Do not assume that you have the exact same interest. Even if she stays and watches basketball games with you, does not mean that she wants to have soccer ball.

Nothing.

-Don’t believe when her when she says that she doesn’t want anything mainly because this is not true. She said this, but she actually is expecting to get something from you. If you don’t give her a gift, chances are you’ll see disappointment on her face.

I wish you good luck in choosing the proper gift for your girlfriend. Remember that you might have to give her something that makes her feel special and loved.

Be thoughtful about it. When you’ve run out of possible choices, get advice from ross Jeffries or try looking at the double your dating review and mystery method. A lot of internet dating sites have lots of suggestions on what women enjoy.

How to Achieve your Aspirations through Self Leadership

We often hear how important it is to set goals if we expect to fulfil our potential or realise our dreams . Read any self-development book, listen to any motivational speaker and they all say  the same thing – goal setting will take you places . Yet how often  have you set a particular goal or pursued a course of action and even so end up well short of your initial aspiration  ? 

 One of the biggest realisations people make when embarking on this kind of journey is that goal setting and goal achieving are two completely different things,  and for me there’s always been a piece of the jigsaw missing. Having recently worked with a top executive coach I discovered a winning recipe for turning goal setting into goal achievement . 

Many people who approach goal setting for the first time dream of living in a bigger house in a better neighbourhood or owning faster cars or moving their children to better schools . These are all valid and achievable  goals  and indeed appear  quite compelling on the surface. If they’re smart they then  , break down this goal into bite sized chunks – they ask themselves; what would I need to earn to make these changes? what does that mean in terms of my annual, monthly and weekly income? It’s at this point the gap between their aspirations and reality strikes them and the perceived enormity of the goal becomes overwhelming . So they keep their goal front of mind in the hope that if they think about it for long enough it will just happen  . This might sound strange but , there are many out there that end up thinking this way and trust some intangible force like a winning lottery ticket to short-cut their journey to success  .

There is another way  but unfortunately for those hoping for the silver bullet you will be disappointed, because this other way requires planning, discipline, endeavour and effort. These are not new concepts  . There might not be a silver bullet but there is a winning formula that if you follow will stack the deck heavily in your favour.

The very first step of this winning formula is to come up with a compelling End Goal. This has got to be such a compelling statement that you’d walk across hot coals and broken glass every day if you had to in order to achieve it.  Driving a faster car is probably not   going to do it for you but achieving financial freedom might. Discovering your End Goal is the first step and an important one, you’ll need to ask yourself these questions over and over again, each time taking your thinking to a higher level until your answer becomes the same for both questions  ;

  • What do I want?
  • What will this do for me?

Now that you’ve created your end goal  , your next step is to come up with Performance Goals , these are the milestones that will help keep you on track and also let you know when you’re off track. To elicit Performance Goals you need to ask yourself these questions ;

  • What will it look like when I’ve achieved my End Goal?
  • How will I know I’ve achieved it?
  • What will I be doing that’s different?
  • How will I be feeling
  • What specifically will have changed in my life that will be clear indications to me and others that I am on track and have achieved my goal?
  • When do I imagine that I will have achieved this goal?
  • What are the key incremental milestones along the way that will be vital sources of data for me to appraise my progress?

So you know where you’re heading and why you’re heading in that direction  . You now need to descend down to the final tier of goals  , these represent the daily disciplines that are within your control. Your process goals are the things that you can do to move towards your performance goals. If you can get up early then get up early. if you can attend a seminar that will give you new skills , then do the research, book your place and attend it. If you can read a book that will help you plan more effectively, then get down to the library and read it. The Process Goals are the less glamorous side of goal setting because it involves getting your hands dirty and physically taking action. They are within your control and require planning, discipline, endeavour and effort.  .

You have no control over your End Goal nor your Performance Goal, the only thing you can control are your Process Goals – the daily disciplines that will move you in the direction of your End Goal . I haven’t found a silver bullet yet and I’ve worked with some experienced executive coaches who say the same thing; start with a compelling end goal, break it down into realistic milestones and performance goals and then focus on the things that you can control and just do the best you can.

 

3 Different Approaches to Resolving Conflict

For most employers and organisations, workplace mediation is a relatively new idea – so to understand what it is and what it isn’t will help you make an informed choice about whether and how to best use it as an intervention to resolve the types of conflict that are common in organisations  .

In a nutshell mediation is a non-confrontational approach to resolving  conflicts and disputes. It involves an independent third party , the mediator , who facilitates a conversation between those involved in the conflict and helps them to talk about the issues at the heart of the conflict the matters that are currently affecting their relationship or productivity    and explore ways of resolving their conflicts in a way that ensures both parties are to some extent satisfied about the outcome they reach . Like any discipline there are different theories, practices and approaches that typically distinguish some experienced mediators from others. Here are the most common approaches to mediation;

Facilitative Mediation
Facilitative mediation is probably one of the earliest forms of mediation based upon the core principles of self determination, free and informed consent and confidentiality. This approach was made popular by the Harvard Negotiation Project as an economic model of conflict resolution. The approach advocates some key principles; self determination, the right to act on one’s own behalf  free and informed consent the understanding that one takes part in the mediation meeting solely on a voluntary basis and equally can leave at any point if they wish   and confidentiality.  
A facilitative mediator is one that acts as a substantively neutral facilitator, in other words they will not remark on, share views or opinions on the content of the conversation. The mediator will manage a structured process, help create a safe environment for the conversation to take place and use their skills to help enhance the quality of the dialogue that takes place . The outcome of the mediation is the responsibility of the parties – it is they who will decide what, if any agreements are to be made and what the terms of those agreements will be  - self determination is a fundamental principle  . It’s the job of the mediator to give the parties the best chance of reaching an agreement and creating the atmosphere that best promotes a settlement discussion. The facilitative mediator will have learnt some core interpersonal skills , process skills, mediation management skills and have a broad understanding of conflict theory .

Transformative Mediation
This model of mediation has its origins in the US, developed by two eminent psychologists  and is based on the idea that human beings have the inherent capacity for strength and connection which become impaired during interpersonal conflict. The role of the transformative mediator is to support the parties find their own way in the conversation such that these inherent capacities get activated. So the process  doesn’t necessarily follow a particular order  and the parties dictate the content, flow , direction and result of the mediation.

Evaluative Mediation
Evaluative mediation is similar in many ways to Facilitative with one important departure; the mediator’s role is to offer parties views and opinions with regard to the relative strengths and weaknesses of each side’s case or argument. So in some ways the role of the mediator can be seen to mirror that of a lawyer, advising parties on the strengths of their case apart from the responsibility for making decisions – which ultimately revert back to the parties.  Evaluative mediation is more popular with commercial disputes and rarely used as an intervention to resolve workplace disputes.

Mediation will save your company time and money. The cost of conflict can be radically reduced as parties talk through their differences rather than call their lawyers. Your HR professionals can then spend their precious time on critical business activities. So whichever mediation approach you take and whichever workplace mediator you decide to choose, the things that are most important to remember are ;

1. The mediator is a neutral person

2. The parties are there on a voluntary basis

3. The parties decide for themselves any agreement or outcome 

 

Using the Law of Attraction As a Process For Self Improvement

People have room for self improvement PLR. Even Jesus had problems that needed to be resolved. I believe this is one of many reasons we are all here in this reality. Being a better person can be a natural impulse even in the most hardened criminal. For many it is only easier to recognize the road that must definitely be followed in order to be a better person.

From my experience I feel that a lot of people believe that self improvement MRR means only focusing on themselves. Many take up meditation, some volunteer work, but still others learn about what direction to go in order to possess a more full and meaningful life. Take a peek around; have you been alone? Obviously the answer is no. We’re sharing this planet with huge amounts of others. Why do we believe that self improvement RR is really a task we have to tackle on our personal? There are plenty of others that will help us reach a stage within our lives where we feel good about ourselves and so are a service to others.

It absolutely was now that I realized that self improvement is approximately the Self. So that as far as I can inform there is just one Self (spot the capital S). We all have been a part of the whole. There isn’t any separation from the universal energy that produces up everything we see and feel. So considering it out of this view when we say self improvement, we are really considering that part of the Self which is our self. This may sound confusing at first, but when you see it, what else could there be? If we had arrived alone by using an island would self improvement represent any use?

So having said that; sounds a little weird whilst I write it, how should we begin Self Improvement? This is how we learn that relationships would be the step to everything. And relationships are not only seen with other people though precisely what exists in our little world we call reality. The way you relate with mother earth and all sorts of her creatures, her plants, the air we breath – everything. To stay total harmony with all that we share with this planet could be the road to Self Improvement. In so doing we enhance the experience most of us can be part of this garden of Eden; and yes we were never kicked out, we had arrived just given a reminder; Improve or else you will be banished!

So where does regulations Of Attraction fit into all this? Simple, through your will to enhance the Self you will attract everything is nice and nourishing from your universal giver. A well meaning person who directs his / her energy in achieving a much better life and a better world will put into motion the method that will lead to Self Improvement. I acknowledge that much continues to be written about the Law of Attraction. In the following paragraphs I am not utilizing it inside the same context to get riches, or other material needs met. I will be simply while using term to explain how to get the things that you need to become a better person and thereby making this planet a better home for everybody today and for all future generations.

Finally, I would like to express a thing that may be beside me for some of playing. I really believe it had been Buddha who said, “no the first is truly enlightened until everyone is enlightened”. So truly we aren’t alone on the path to Self Improvement. Let’s reach out and help one another – let us get there together!

Help Enhance Your Brain

Our brain is the centrepiece of our nervous system. Subconscious activities like heartbeat, respiration and digestion are controlled by the brain. Reasoning, thought and abstraction, also controlled by the brain, are known as higher order functions. It controls involuntary activities such as respiration, digestion, and heartbeat, which are also known as automatic functions of the body. This organ also controls other conscious activities that are considered as higher order activities like reasoning, abstraction, and thought. The human brain is superior to any other brain of any other living species that are known to humankind.

The brain is also the center by which other human characteristics are defined. Creativity, for example, is much associated with the brain.So is personality. The brain allows us to process decisions, it lets us define colours, and smells. This organ controls every other perceived activity of the human body.

The brain, however strong it may appear, however invincible it might look, won’t always remain that way. Over time, the brain will deteriorate as would any other part of the human body. One’s lifestyles and all other external factors will take toll against the human brain. As a person ages, the brain slows down; it deteriorates in terms of functioning, and of rejuvenating itself. However, there are ways on how to enhance the power of the human brain as age catches up. In this article we try to provide hints on how to achieve this.

1. Live a healthy lifestyle.

The brain is an crucial part of the human anatomy. It is quite possibly the most important organ in the body; but of course, everybody knows that every other organ in the body works for the others to function correctly. The human brain is at the mercy of the way of life of the person who owns it. If the person loves alcohol, this individual may not fully reap the powers of his brain. Alcohol and other risky substances destroy brain cells. An alcoholic will argue that, “I’ve been using only ten percent of my brain, drinking will switch on the other 90% of it.” This is a total misconception. This premonition was formulated in the 1800s and there is no truth in it. The brain is a lifetime organ, so we must maintain and take care of it.

2. Eat the right foods.
 
Eating the right sets of food will certainly benefit the brain. The brain is the most active part of the body. Even when one sleeps, the brain remains active and vibrant. The brain will appreciate it if one eats the proper and balanced sets of food. The sad thing is that the brain is usually taken for granted when it comes to having a balanced meal or a workout because people are so focused into developing their outside looks. It’s about time that we give the brain a break.

3. Engage in proper exercise.

Proper exercise is good for the brain and not only for the body. A wel-balanced life is essential for the brain.4. Release stress once in a while

Releasing stress is essential to be able to clear the brain from all the difficulties and clouds in one’s life. One must take time to get into a relaxing mood and a good night’s sleep.

Your brain should be treasured. No individual will ever be able to live his life to the fullest if his brain is not functioning well. A well-maintained brain will result in a more active and fulfilling life.

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Find Your Own Greatness

We enjoy reading their stories; stories of great men and women who against all odds not only found success but became legendary in the process.  Many of us soon conclude that such amazing feats are reserved for these few chosen few but our own life will forever be mundane and insignificant. 

And yet, it is this exact poisonous thinking that traps you and prevents you from reaching the potential you know is within you but can’t seem to extract. I have often wondered what makes some men great.  My personal conclusions have lead me to two very important factors.  They are belief and unwavering determination. 

Belief is that unshakable confidence you feel when you know to your core that you’re right.   It’s what propelled a man like George Washington to continue on despite devastating loses. In fact, he lost almost every battle except the one that mattered the most.  Through it all, he stayed the course dismissing critics and traitors alike.   Yes, luck played a role as it often does men of greatness.    But what is luck if not the very manifestation of faith? It took a rare fog to save his army from complete annihilation in New York.  That fog arrived precisely when he needed it.   It was as if his will created the very thing that could save him.  Can such really be possible?  

In business, self made men that created out of nothing thriving companies that employed thousands and bettered the lives of millions did not happen in an instant.  Men such as Andrew Carnige that risked everything he had both mentally and monetarily on an idea, helped to physically create the very nation we enjoy today.   

The examples are exhaustive but the theme remains true.  Faith, belief, confidence, name it what you will, but it is incredibly important.  It resides in you too.  If you think this is too cliche, you’re getting closer to your problem.  Modern society has contributed mightily to loss of faith.  We want instant gratification or we quit.  We are unwilling to toil for years and reach the brink of failure only to wrestle success from its insidious grasp.  That’s what the winners do.   Equipped with incredible belief, they fight until they have no more fight to give.  

Perhaps you are businessman struggling in a tough economy and money is running low.  How does a pep talk help you?  Well, I live in reality and I have learned that your spirit can remain strong by choice even as your financial state contracts.  Your will might have to fill in where dollars are scarce.  Whether you are presenting a better way to sell office supplies against fierce competition, or inventing a life saving medical device, the journey is often the same.  Success requires that we be willing to skate the line of failure.  It is the walk through fire that earns you the right to claim victory.  Some may achieve instant success but these cases are not the norm.  One sure fire way to become discouraged is to expect immediate success.    Focus instead on the feeling of your desired end result and nothing more.  This will serve as your fuel.

One of the greatest inventors of all time, Thomas Edison, tried over 6,000 times before he found the right filament to burn inside what would become the light bulb.   With it the world changed too.  How many of us would be persistent enough to do this?  How many would have given up after the 30th, the 50th, or ever the 15th time? The answer is those willing to be ordinary would have.  While my aspirations may be simpler, they I am required to be no less dedicated.   Armed with a cardscan and a few other office machines I am steadfast in my approach.  I want to sell millions of smead file folders through my company.  I want to challenge the big box supply stores in my industry because I believe I have a better way.  Now, I need only to stay the course.   You have opportunities within your field as well.

  Many of us were taught as kids that we can become or do whatever we want.  The early stages of dissatisfaction can be found right here.  As such, I do not subscribe to this mentality but instead keep at least one foot in reality.   I do however believe that there is greatness in all of us.  The hard part is finding it nurturing it and confidently and doggedly pursuing it.   When your inner greatness is discovered, opportunities and luck will suddenly appear where they could not be found before.